Grandma's Memorial Service

之前沒有寫是因為覺得有很多的事情involve.... 有些也不想說, 因為處於無解的狀態, 所以就乾脆不寫.~

 

告別式一切非常的順利, 歸榮耀給 神! Thanks to all who prayed for us. :) 其實我自己個人很多時很無力, 所以很多時處於放棄的狀況. 我爸媽所擺上的真的的多, 當然我姑姑們, 阿姨們, 叔叔們還有很多熟或不熟悉的親戚們也都很關心跟幫忙. 自從奶奶過世後, 每天大家就按照時間, 一天三次 10 am, 3 pm, & 8 pm 在我家聚集唱詩歌讚美. 歌曲包括"萬王a王" (奶奶的最愛), "你是信實的上帝", "耶和華祝福滿滿", "輕輕聽", "奇異恩典", 及一首台語流行歌 "媽媽" 等. 哥花了很多時間做個紀錄片, 加錄了多位的懷念感言. 還在一次為了錄我的鋼琴, 不小心洗掉, 在告別式前幾天重做, 使他和小鳳姐可犧牲了不少睡眠. 打著奶奶的生平介紹, 我才知道奶奶在60歲前其實都很吃苦. 我爸年輕時的發願, 也總算在跟我媽結婚後, 接了奶奶來住台南. My grandma looked sooo cute, she's always so naive and considerate. 看著奶奶最後這幾個月的clips, 真的就忍不住落淚... but thank God, I know where she is right now. Heaven is where her home is, and I will see her again in her glorious form again. No more fake tooth, no more slump back, she'll be in a perfect condition! :)

 

安葬在富貴南山的"路得館", I still can't believe that I didn't get to see her last face.... but in bone ashes. 整個程序都有 神保守, 不是基督徒的親朋好友也都跟著我們的形式. 堂哥跟堂姐也自己說有信主跟沒有信主的致詞就是有差, 他們說我爸聽起來很正義稟然, 也很有深度. I felt God's seeds planted somewhere, but seems will need more than a lot to water them, and it requires lots persistent and continuous prayers for them. 可是我自己受culture的影響很多時候很無力, 情緒不好, 想躲. Yeh, like what Joseph said,  I'm coping a lot faster than him who stayed here more than half a year by now, but I know cuz I'm treating this as a vacation, not a permanent home. Sounds indifferent? I'm just so confused of my mixed feelings. However, the memorial service was a blessing to all who came, and also to our own HUGE families & relatives. *我家族比我想像中還要大... incredible.

 

7/28/08 12:40 pm

08 1st Sunday at Tainan!

Today felt like a long day. The kids area was better compared to the adults service..... *Maybe I'm being picky & impatient but the announcements are way TOO dragging and I felt pointless for some of the parts! Perhaps I'm being judgmental, but when the purposes are not specified, I wonder the functions of various programs/events offered. After obtaining the approval from my cousin, I just walked out and decided to check out the kids' service where Lina served downstairs. I can't believe they have snacks prepared for kids after splitting into group discussions, it so surprised me! :) After church today, I helped out teaching "My Redeemer Lives" to some 3rd & 4th graders. It was more than just sweats, I felt lighter afterwards. lol

 

Shopped a little bit at 名加美, picked up Joseph, then six of us headed to 二輪戲院 - to save money!! There're at least 3 movies that I've wanna watch but never had a slight chance before July. We ended up watching "決勝21點" & "頭彩冤家" which I never heard of before! 很急促的去安平吃豆花, 買Dana & Barnett's McDonald, 送他們上統聯, 就剩下Josh & 她女友和我跟哥去吃小火鍋. *能吃不貴又不辣的火鍋真是幸福~ Just so thankful that I finally get to watch MOVIES after my last one of"300" at the theater so long ago!

 

Typhoon's around the corner, but I have so many errands to run tomorrow!!! Happy Birthday Daddy!

Arrived Tainan

Arrived Tainan 2:45 am in the morning. Since most of the public phones have changed to IC-card inserting machines, I couldn't find even one regular phone for me to call my family. Was going to walk home... which I initiatelly did. With my big suitcase, I was heading home & walking on the street around 3 am in the morning. But then in the industrial regions, the street dogs were just too scary for me, 我告訴自己: "幹麼逞英雄呢?" Then went to 7-11.

 

After shower and everything, I couldn't fall asleep. 沒有時差阿, 可是從國內回來的. 可是五點了, 總得睡. Woke up at 8:30 in the morning, then later on got to sing praises w/ families as remembrance of my grandma. Term paper... I'm coming, just bear w/ my hectic schedule. I've always kept you at the back of my mind......

 

有約13+ yrs, 我和我家人沒有同一起待在台灣生活過了. 不是爸回來就是媽, 不是哥回來就是我. First time in the past 13-14 yrs, we have this opportunity to live in Taiwan together for a short period of time - 是因為奶奶. I believe grandma is at a better place than anywhere else on earth. Look UP!

 

July 22, 11:53 am

2nd Year in CQ

CQ camp is over, successfully. Thanks to those who have been praying for us, everything went very smoothly and we found favor in their eyes. His name is great in CQ! *Peter2, Yumi, Annie, Sophie, Amy, Sharpay, Emma2, Ann, Robert, Victor, Lily, Qiqi, Mark, Gigyko, Leo, Hunter, Tan Yang, Gillian, Sherry, Shelly, Dora, Maple, Mike, Jelty, Linda, Natalie, Nancy, Crystal.

 

Side note: Grandma passed away on 7/16 5:20 pm. I didn't get to see her last face as I planned to... Steph said that her grandma passed away during her mission trip 3 years ago too, but I still felt a mixed feeling. Last full day in CQ.

HK Airport

Arrived at HK airport around 5ish am, slept in the lounge loooking like a homeless for a few hours =p Start missing the ppl from the states. Teaching starts tomorrow, definitely need good rest & preparation tonight. *Feeling quite comfortable in Asia countries... roots, roots, roots.

 

9:20 am HK Time.

Family in the US

A meaningful & a catch-up lunch w/ E & the couple! We stayed in the Souplentation for four & half hours... ha, 把很久沒聊的話可是一次全分享出來, 希望到台灣還會碰到面. Spiritual advisers are soo precious and important to me, that's what I love about VOH - we're a family!

再次的挑戰

Eng. camp is around the corner again. Honestly, I had forgotten almost all the frustrations I had last year oversea, until this morning.... when I got the phone call from CQ. 我比較想得起來困難到底在哪了 - 我的心臟沒有很強壯. 我是沒有什麼都很flexible, 但是太多最後一分鐘的更改我真的很難當家常便飯. 在沒有預防下, 今早開始重新體會需要的第一心裡建設針. 之前一直忙其他在這需要take care的事, 教學的事其實還沒認真準備. But it's time! Time for me to be extra wary; a time to test my discipleship. 一整天gotta run some errands and thanks for the heads-up, Lord, please be with our team from now till we leave CQ! *Leaving tonight.

CHOOSE to be Thankful

Thanks for adjusting me Lord, although it does feel so painful. So much need to learn to be humble, and let His righteousness take over rather than my own judgment. Might feel numb cuz unconsciously wanna avoid thinking about it, but please don't let me go. I can't even rely on myself... nothing to hold on to. You've set me free, and I choose to believe and live it out. THANK YOU ABBA. Your joy is my strength!

July 4th

最近有點感到迷失, 就會放空. July 4th, I didn't go anywhere particular, other than helped packing the camp's supplies, studied, and stayed home. 做事情我算是滿快速的把握時間, 可是有些事情就是學習得很慢. 琴藝怎樣就是卡在個關卡, 真的好無力, 總覺得沒有些人的開竅. But, on the other hand, I have to give thanks to the Lord; He really provided something I needed. Jehovah Jirah.

警醒不代表緊張, 我需要不緊張.
如果會讓我遇到, 就是代表祢的恩典夠我用, 那就使我的心可以沈澱, 不會起起伏伏.

Another Great Class!

A very intensive summer course that I just finished today; tons of post-writings are awaiting me... the classmates were fabulous, all of them! The professor really turned the environment into a very safe place for us to explore, to meditate, to discuss, and most of all, to mingle! Even though I did sth really silly, kinda embarrassing today in front of SO many of them, I guess it's alright... esp. after Mark's console. =p Apparently no one wanted to leave, just wanna stay a bit longer and chill. Well, ciao - my only summer MAWL class. I'll miss the good times we had in the straight past 6 days, videotaping & evaluating one another, plus laughing out loud together!

Gloria, Christie, Tony, Shin, Ed2, Travis, Adam, Mark, Randall, & Dr. Altizer!